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Dreams, wishes and goals

Just a little mind dump today. I'm studying for a microbiology test that I'm sure I will do well on but still - I'm feeling a certain amount of pressure to do better than I have been doing. It's not like CIS class, where it's fun, I'm learning and I know I'll do well, but now the stakes are higher.

When I was a kid I thought often about wanting to be a doctor. I can't say I'm sorry that my life followed the path it did - I'm happy with my life. I have a great husband and kids, supportive parents and siblings. But, as a teen had I had a little better idea of what I could accomplish I would've chosen a different path. More math, more science, and not be so wrapped up in the elusive teen girl things. I should've known (and did, down in my heart)that I was different - not your average teen girl. But sometimes the goals of a 16 year-old don't dovetail with truly adult goals/needs.

So, I didn't go the med school path. Whatever. But, I can still get "there" from here. I am smart, I have good judgment, and I have compassion. All good skills for a nurse, which I am. It's my mission, my path, my service. And I have to do it to the best of my ability, employing my head and using the tools God gave me.

I envy my daughter, Erin. She knows she's smart and she knows how to study and how to get, at least academically, what she wants. Already in 6th grade she speaks of going to college as an eventuality and by gum, I believe she's going to do it.

Just some thoughts.

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